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Thread: 3/5/2014 Game Thread #61: Pacers Vs. Bobcats

  1. #1
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    Default 3/5/2014 Game Thread #61: Pacers Vs. Bobcats

    MORE THAN ONE WAY
    TO SKIN THESE
    McBOBKITTIES



    -VS-



    Game Time Start: 7:00 PM ET
    Where: Time Warner Cable Arena, Charlotte, NC
    Officials: D. Jones, M. Ayotte, E. Roe

    Media Notes: Indiana Notes, Charlotte Notes
    Television: FOX Sports Indiana / SportsSouth Charlotte
    Radio: WFNI 1070 AM, 107.5 FM / WFNZ 610 AM
    NBA Feeds:

    REMINDER: Per PD policy, please do not share a link to, describe how to search for, request a link to, or request a PM about streaming video of a NBA game that is not coming directly through the NBA. Not even in a "wink-wink, nudge-nudge, know-what-I-mean" round-about sort of way. Thank you


    Season Records: (W-L)
    46-14
    Away: 17-10
    East: 29-6
    27-33
    Home: 15-14
    East: 17-18
    Upcoming Games:
    Mar 07
    Mar 09
    Mar 11
    Mar 14
    at
    at
    vs
    at
    9:30pm
    7:30pm
    7:00pm
    7:00pm

    Projected Starting Lineup:
    HIBBERT
    WEST
    GEORGE
    STEPHENSON
    HILL
    Projected Starting Lineup:
    JEFFERSON
    McROBERTS
    KIDD-GILCHRIST
    NEAL
    WALKER



    PACERS
    Andrew Bynum - stuck X button (out) [H/T Richard_Skull]


    BOBCATS
    Brendan Haywood - Stress Fracture, Left Foot (out)
    Gerald Henderson - Right Calf Strain (day-to-day)
    Jeffery Taylor - Ruptured Right Achilles Tendon (out)


    Perpetually Disappointing Trader Joe Minimally Relevant Video:


    Semi-Relevant Video:



    Semi-Relevant Trivia:

    In the 10 seasons the Bobcats have been around they
    have only managed winning records against four teams
    -- the Timberwolves, Kings, Warriors and one team
    from the East. Which team is the fourth and final team
    the Bobcats are above .500 against?

    A. Milwaukee Bucks
    B. New York Knicks
    C. Philadelphia 76ers
    D. Toronto Raptors
    E. Washington Wizards
    Spoiler Spoiler:


    McSweeney's:
    Miles Wray: Funder Claps - Hook Me Up, Playa! By Lawrence Funderburke

    UNDER REVIEW:
    HOOK ME UP, PLAYA!: AN INSIDER’S LOOK INTO THE FINANCIAL
    FORTUNES, MISFORTUNES, AND FORTUNATE LESSONS LEARNED
    FROM MODERN-DAY PROFESSIONAL ATHLETES

    BY LAWRENCE FUNDERBURKE
    (WETHERBY PRESS, 2005, 195 PAGES)

    Even for dedicated NBA fans, Lawrence Funderburke is the answer to only very difficult
    trivia questions. The sweet spot of Funderburke’s career—actually basically his whole
    career, discounting a sojourn in Europe and a blink-length cameo for the Chicago Bulls
    —was from 1997-2003, when he played 15 minutes a night for the Sacramento Kings to
    provide hustle, rebounding, and a breather for All-Star forward Chris Webber. Even
    though the Kings were usually a playoff team in that era, the cowbells jangling from
    humble, raucous Arco Arena through to bemused television audiences across the nation,
    Funderburke never contributed to any of the things that make the NBA sexy and awe-
    inspiring. Since his childhood Funderburke has been able to do things on a basketball
    court that the rest of us can only do when we are deep in REM. But against the best
    competition in the world, his contributions on the court were as glamorous—albeit as
    essential—as a faucet, function dwarfing form.

    In the 2012-13 NBA season, 18 players—two of whom did not appear in a single game
    (Andrew Bynum, Derrick Rose)—earned more money for their year of work than
    Funderburke earned throughout his entire NBA career. Combine that with the fact that
    Funderburke made his money from a basketball arena surrounded by farmland, and
    we have an unlikely candidate to write a book that aspires to provide all professional
    athletes with the savvy and foresight to successfully manage their newfound wealth.
    However, Funderburke is qualified: he graduated magna *** laude from Ohio State
    with a degree in finance, which is an impressive life accomplishment even if he were
    not also averaging 14 points a game for the basketball team. And, in the Sacramento
    years, Lawrence Funderburke earned over $15 million dollars, a bargain in NBA
    budget terms for a dependable but unremarkable bench player like Funderburke.
    However, in the real world—and it is worth mentioning that Funderburke does live in
    the real world—that is an incomprehensible amount of money.

    An important thing to know about Hook Me Up, Playa! is that it is the rare book with
    a cover that wages an ideological war against the chapters it contains within. The
    front cover was assembled by a person who simply could not have read the actual
    book. In a baggy suit, Lawrence Funderburke nonchalantly gestures the money that
    charitably drifts like snowflakes around him—some of the bills are immaculate 50s
    and 100s captured at improbably front-facing angles; others are crumpled 1s—a
    hellish blaze somewhere behind him illuminating the scene in a menacing red, the
    book’s title superimposed across his waist, presented in a wacky electric neon font
    that a second-grader using WordArt in the Sierra Vista Elementary computer room,
    would probably have rejected for being too gimmicky. To judge the book by this
    cover, it appears that Funderburke has tossed off a series of name-dropping and
    detail-spilling tales to a ghostwriter about his decadent days and upscale nights
    holding down one of the world’s more coveted and public jobs.

    In reality, the book is a levelheaded and sobering list of lessons about fiscal
    responsibility. At times Funderburke even dips into the same optimistically
    delusional tone of a textbook or syllabus: “Another good approach for athletes to
    educate themselves in this area is to use some of the time they spend traveling to
    read and learn about financial matters. Check the Internet or your local library for
    recommended reading.” Try to imagine a professional athlete strolling to the local
    civic center and loading up on his/her library card before a long road trip, or
    ignoring everybody else on the team plane while keeping his/her nose deeply buried
    in Your 401(k) for Dummies.

    The book’s central refrain continually warns the newly monetarily endowed
    professional athlete about the world’s “hook-me-uppers”: those friends, shady
    acquaintances, and distant cousins who will emerge from all corners once a
    lucrative contract has been signed. The hook-me-uppers will proceed to ask the
    athlete for four- and five-figure chunks of that salary to help fund a “can’t-miss
    investment opportunity” or similar deal—your spam folder sprung to real life. So,
    the title Hook Me Up, Playa! is not a grinning catchphrase asking for another round
    of the world’s finer things. It’s the siren song of the shameless scammer who
    interprets the wealthy athlete as an unlocked ATM. For Funderburke, the threat of
    the hook-me-upper looms so large and inevitable that, like Lord of the Rings, his
    tale must be named after its antagonist.

    As a person who has been too timid to even say hello to the handful of athletes I have
    seen in public, I am boggled by the fact that there are people who not only say “hello”
    but do so while trying to reach around into the athlete’s back pocket. Last year, I saw
    Kareem Abdul-Jabaar at a record store. I found a low-trafficked corner and then stood
    there, jaw agape, watching him browse through the jazz section. If I saw him in a
    record store again, I probably would end up doing the same. I just don’t want to
    interrupt his, uh, record shopping I guess. So I have very literally no idea what
    thoughts go through a person’s head enabling him/her to stride up to an athlete in
    public—or boldly dial the number to Lawrence Funderburke’s hotel room, which it
    seems plenty of tenacious hook-me-uppers have done over the years—and then ask
    for money. I suppose I had always assumed that annoying an athlete in public would
    get you wordlessly whisked away by two Kimbo Slice-sized bodyguards.

    If the message about hook-me-uppers had not come so modestly and earnestly, I
    don’t think I would have believed that the hook-me-upper existed. But I guess the
    hook-me-uppers exist, and exist universally—Funderburke doesn’t limit his message to
    NBA players...CONTINUE READING AT McSWEENEY'S


    140 Characters of (Non-PD) Coverage

    Pacers
    Candace Buckner @CandaceDBuckner
    Jared Wade @8pts9secs
    Tim Donahue @TimDonahue8p9s
    Tom Lewis @indycornrows
    Ian Levy @HickoryHigh
    Whitney @its_whitney

    Bobcats
    Rick Bonnell @rick_bonnell
    Ben Swanson @CardboardGerald
    Brett Hainline @BrettQCHoops
    Derek James @DerekJamesNBA
    Joshua B. Priemski @HoopPlusTheHarm
    Spencer Percy @QCHspencer
    This is the darkest timeline.

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  3. #2
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    Default Re: 3/5/2014 Game Thread #61: Pacers Vs. Bobcats

    That thanks is fer the Ryan Adams vid.

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    Default Re: 3/5/2014 Game Thread #61: Pacers Vs. Bobcats



    Game Time!

    This maybe the slowest game that we have seen in awhile with 2 Defensive Minded "Slow the game to a crawl" Teams facing off.

    I really hope that they defend Gary Neal and his 3pt shooting. The only reason they acquired him is cuz of his 3pt shooting and the rest of the Team's lack of 3pt threats.
    Ash from Army of Darkness: Good...Bad...I'm the guy with the gun.

    This is David West, he is the Honey Badger, West just doesn't give a *****....he's pretty bad *ss cuz he has no regard for any other Player or Team whatsoever.

  5. #4

    Default Re: 3/5/2014 Game Thread #61: Pacers Vs. Bobcats

    This team in a nutshell...

    1. Serious gut check talk.

    2. Lance plays poor perimeter defense.

    3. Hibbert takes 18' jump shot.

    4. Paul George throws bad pass.

    5. Where's the change?

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  7. #5

    Default Re: 3/5/2014 Game Thread #61: Pacers Vs. Bobcats

    I am noticing there are not many good defensive PFs in the league these days. Feels like West always has a great matchup for us.

  8. #6

    Default Re: 3/5/2014 Game Thread #61: Pacers Vs. Bobcats

    Stop with the damn Hibbert jump shots...

  9. #7

    Default Re: 3/5/2014 Game Thread #61: Pacers Vs. Bobcats

    What a pathetic start. Wow. Every game nowadays.

  10. #8

    Default Re: 3/5/2014 Game Thread #61: Pacers Vs. Bobcats

    PG with 2 3 pointers in 2 minutes :/

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    Default Re: 3/5/2014 Game Thread #61: Pacers Vs. Bobcats

    Quote Originally Posted by immortality View Post
    This quote is hidden because you are ignoring this member. Show Quote
    PG with 2 3 pointers in 2 minutes :/
    Decent looks, but we can for sure get better. Even worse, 3 deep shots from Roy Hibbert.

  13. #10

    Default Re: 3/5/2014 Game Thread #61: Pacers Vs. Bobcats

    Here they go again with this slow start crap

  14. #11
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    Default Re: 3/5/2014 Game Thread #61: Pacers Vs. Bobcats

    The lighter they use to light a fire under our *** must have ran out of fluid


    Sent from my iPhone using Tapatalk

  15. #12

    Default Re: 3/5/2014 Game Thread #61: Pacers Vs. Bobcats

    Paul George playing like a real wiener tonight.

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    Default Re: 3/5/2014 Game Thread #61: Pacers Vs. Bobcats

    Horrible play so far

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    Default Re: 3/5/2014 Game Thread #61: Pacers Vs. Bobcats

    really Lance....REALLY lol

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    Default Re: 3/5/2014 Game Thread #61: Pacers Vs. Bobcats

    Roy's D has been awful lately.

  19. #16

    Default Re: 3/5/2014 Game Thread #61: Pacers Vs. Bobcats

    I am so sick of Stephenson's ****. Sit his ***. So sick of him not being engaged on defense and forcing things on offense.

  20. #17
    Lifelong Pacer Fan. PGisthefuture's Avatar
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    Default Re: 3/5/2014 Game Thread #61: Pacers Vs. Bobcats

    What is going on...

  21. #18

    Default Re: 3/5/2014 Game Thread #61: Pacers Vs. Bobcats

    Put me on the screw this lackadaisical team bandwagon. Getting embarrassing to watch a team this talented play like a bunch of lazy scrubs.

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    Default Re: 3/5/2014 Game Thread #61: Pacers Vs. Bobcats

    Well isn't that special...

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    Default Re: 3/5/2014 Game Thread #61: Pacers Vs. Bobcats

    my god Frank take a TO

  24. #21
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    Default Re: 3/5/2014 Game Thread #61: Pacers Vs. Bobcats

    Not a good start for Lance or for the team
    Tonight, all flags must burn, in place of steeples.
    Autonomy must return into the hands of the people.

    Panopticon

    -------------

    CJ Watson - 20 points on 6/10 shooting!

    13/4/2014

  25. #22
    Lifelong Pacer Fan. PGisthefuture's Avatar
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    Default Re: 3/5/2014 Game Thread #61: Pacers Vs. Bobcats

    I don't think I've ever seen that Douglas-Roberts haircut before.
    Last edited by PGisthefuture; 03-05-2014 at 08:28 PM.

  26. #23
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    Default Re: 3/5/2014 Game Thread #61: Pacers Vs. Bobcats

    Again, the people who got mad at the people who said this team wasn't playing well, this is why they said it. Offense is making my eyes bleed.
    @qandrews9428

  27. #24
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    Default Re: 3/5/2014 Game Thread #61: Pacers Vs. Bobcats

    Oh look, the Pacers are struggling. AGAIN.
    Stop quoting people I have on ignore!

  28. #25
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    Default Re: 3/5/2014 Game Thread #61: Pacers Vs. Bobcats

    Time to send some messages to a few starters. Play better or someone else will.

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