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Thread: Random, Scattered Disturbed Thoughts

  1. #1376
    International Counter bellisimo's Avatar
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    Default Re: Random, Scattered Disturbed Thoughts

    Quote Originally Posted by Hoop View Post
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    That was me!

    I'm pretty sure its a fake profile/account...but i'm more than happy to find out just who is behind it....

    in case anyone was wonderin' about the photos....




    i did a bit of a research...and in another website...they are also listed from the same country - Austria...with the same name and photos...but over there they are listed as 18 and a capricorn...while over here they are 15 and a libra...

  2. #1377
    flexible and robust SoupIsGood's Avatar
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    Default Re: Random, Scattered Disturbed Thoughts

    1377
    You, Never? Did the Kenosha Kid?

  3. #1378
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    Default Re: Random, Scattered Disturbed Thoughts

    Quote Originally Posted by bellisimo View Post
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    She seems to really like the drink she's having.
    Word on the street is he doesn't want your money, he only wants to please your ears...
    Bum in Berlin on Myspace

  4. #1379
    Fear my small avatar Gyron's Avatar
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    Default Re: Random, Scattered Disturbed Thoughts

    Tip of the day from a friend of mine.....And I'll post a couple more after this.....

    If you go to the roach coach in the morning...

    And you order the 'Carne Asada Burrito with Jalapenos'....

    And you tell the cook 'Use the green habenero sauce instead of the red Tapa Tio sauce today please'...

    And he says 'Joo sure joo want jalapenos on that steell?'...

    Take this as a sign...

    You're about to make a mistake.

    And when you confirm you do in fact want jalapenos on it with the habanero sauce... and the cook shakes his head in disbelief...

    It will be a grave mistake.

  5. #1380
    Fear my small avatar Gyron's Avatar
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    Default Re: Random, Scattered Disturbed Thoughts

    Next one in the series.....

    When the roach coach pulls up (and yes... hearing the roach coach come is generally the high point of my day)... blowing their custom horn that plays 'La Cookaracha' (SP?) it's best not to say 'YES! The roach coach!' within ear shot of the cook.

    Cook says 'We runs a real beeznis. Theese no roach coach'.

    I say 'Umm why does your horn play that song then?'

    Cook says 'Been day hoe green go'.

    I thnik that actually translates to 'Mighty eater of peppers' in spanish. Although with the context of the convo at that point I'm not sure why he said it just then. Cuz like I said... he was up in arms over that whole roach coach thing.

  6. #1381
    DIET COKE! Trader Joe's Avatar
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    Default Re: Random, Scattered Disturbed Thoughts

    Quote Originally Posted by Raskolnikov View Post
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    She seems to really like the drink she's having.
    She'd probably like it even more if she took the cap off.

    “WE NEVER SURRENDER, WE NEVER GIVE UP, WE KEEP ATTACKING”- Frank Vogel
    momentarygodsblog.com https://twitter.com/momentarygods

  7. #1382
    Fear my small avatar Gyron's Avatar
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    Default Re: Random, Scattered Disturbed Thoughts

    When at the roach coach (you guys are sick of the roach coach aren't you?) and the cook mentions 'Free Holies' he isn't inviting you to discuss religion.

    Religion should be free no matter what Jim and Tammy Fae tell you IMHO.

    Don't know why the cook got so worked up over this. But he eventually said 'fine no beans for joo'.

    Wouldn't give me beans because I said religion should be free?

  8. #1383
    Fear my small avatar Gyron's Avatar
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    Default Re: Random, Scattered Disturbed Thoughts

    If you are in your office. And you have to fart. Close the door.


    While the distance from your desk to the hallway may protect others from the smell... sounds will still travel that distance.


    This tip especially holds true for those times when you think no one is in yet and there is a admin assistant just outside your office.
    *ahem*

  9. #1384
    Fear my small avatar Gyron's Avatar
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    Default Re: Random, Scattered Disturbed Thoughts

    Let me preface this by saying that we ate at a REALLY good Japanese Resturant the night before and had LOTS of PLUM wine. And everyone knows how plums help out the intestinal tract.

    So here's the tip:

    When you are staying on the top floor(17th floor) of your hotel and have to take the elevator down(especially a SLOW elevator), DON'T Fart as soon as you get onto the elevator. Even if you are alone. For two reason's, both which applied in this situation. 1. You can't escape the smell, your eyes will water. 2. When the elevator stops on the 16th floor to pick up 3 more people and then again on the 12th floor, they too have to smell it, and since you are the only one on the elevator, there's no doubt in their mind who dealt it.

  10. #1385
    Fear my small avatar Gyron's Avatar
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    Default Re: Random, Scattered Disturbed Thoughts

    Another tip from the big city trip......

    Don't volunteer your credit card to start the tab with at the bar after dinner, even if there are only 4 of you.

    Unfortuantely now, I have to figure out how to explain that $357 Bar tab in my expense report. Don't guess our controller will believe that I was entertaining 53 of our best clients?

  11. #1386
    Fear my small avatar Gyron's Avatar
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    Default Re: Random, Scattered Disturbed Thoughts

    Ever seen a hooker price sheet? ONe of my old friends once explained to our old gaming forum what the basic run down for hookers involves.....Had most of us laughing for a while.....

    $1000

    Top shelf rate.
    Quality of aspiring actress/dancer.
    Rate covers the night, but usually ends somewhere in the middle.

    $500


    Average adult dancer quality.
    Few hours of fun.
    Nothing too kinky, just good ole sex.

    $300


    Plain Jane quality, roll of the dice here.
    Hour of fun.
    Extras cost more moneys.
    Risks of drug usage pretty high.

    $100


    BJ from a skank.
    Looks are not an issue, you get what you pay for.
    20 minutes usually.
    Risks are very high, watch for mouth sores.

    FREE at first, Pay forever afterwards!!

    Free at first, might take a few dates.
    Cost of wedding and ring.
    First week of blissful sex included.
    Next 50 years if you make it that long, NO SEX for free.
    Must buy jewelry to get the sex you want. Bigger the stone, better the sex.
    Plus side, no risks of disease, if you check the blood tests first and they don't cheat on ya.

  12. #1387
    Fear my small avatar Gyron's Avatar
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    Default Re: Random, Scattered Disturbed Thoughts

    A story from when I was in Chicago for a business trip one time a few years ago.....

    We were sitting in the Wyndham Hotel Bar, called Caliterra having drinks. Nice little place located on the second floor of the Wyndham Hotel. Directly accross the street is the Red Roof Inn.

    This was about midnight on our first night there. We looked out the window to see a light come on in the Red Roof Inn hotel room directly across from the bar windows. The next thing we see is a guy and two girls stripping clothes off feverishly hands going everywhere. They proceeded to have wild sex with the drapes open and about 40 or so people in Caliterra enjoying a nice well lit show. I don't think they ever realized the drapes were open because te rest of the night after the festivities, they walked around the room completely nekkid. It was quite funny and enjoyable for the voyuer in all of us

    The bar manager said they see stuff like that all the time.

    He told us about two prevous instances he could remember.

    One was this guy came into on of the hotel rooms across from the bar with the sheer drapes closed, but the others not. Apparently he didn't think that you could see through them at night, bt when the lights on inside the hotel room and its dark out side you can see right through like they aren't even there. The guy proceeds to strip down to his birthday suit, sit on the end of the bed and choke the chicken. The bar manager said that was the night he decided to have blinds put in the bar for future incidents such as that. He said that was the worst thing to be pooring drinks(bartender looks directly accross the bar out the window) and see that.

    The other incident, which prompted him to learn room numbers of the windows across the street was a woman came in, same thing with the sheer curtains closed, but still being able to see clearly though at night, with several shopping bags from her trip that day. She proceeded to strip down and begin trying on the numerous outfits she had purchased that day. He said the the woman must have changed clothes about 15 times that night to the enjoyment of the male patrons of the bar. He said he wanted to call over to her room and tell her that he liked the blue outfit better, but he thought he'd better not for the fact that he enjoys his job too much. 8)

  13. #1388
    Fear my small avatar Gyron's Avatar
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    Default Re: Random, Scattered Disturbed Thoughts

    Ten Top Indicators that your Employer has changed to a cheaper HMO:

    10. Your annual breast exam is done at Hooters.

    9. Directions to your doctor's office include "Take a left when you enter
    the trailer park."

    8. The tongue depressors taste faintly of Fudgesicles.

    7. The only proctologist in the plan is "Gus" from Roto-Rooter.

    6. The only item listed under Preventative Care coverage is "An apple a
    day."

    5. Your primary care physician is wearing the pants you gave to Goodwill
    last month.

    4. "The patient is responsible for 200% of out-of-network-charges" is not
    a
    typo.

    3. The only expense covered 100% is embalming.

    2. With your last HMO, your Prozac didn't come in different colors with
    little M's on them.


    And the number 1 sign you've joined a cheap HMO:

    1. You ask for Viagra; you get a Popsicle stick and duct tape.

  14. #1389
    dennaB Twes's Avatar
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    Default Re: Random, Scattered Disturbed Thoughts

    I usually try to hold back on charm until I have my food.

    Especially when there could be an international incident, like the cook yacking in my food and me having to bust a clip in him.

    I prefer to keep everything friendly.


  15. #1390
    dennaB Twes's Avatar
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    Default Re: Random, Scattered Disturbed Thoughts

    Quote Originally Posted by Gyron View Post
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    Ten Top Indicators that your Employer has changed to a cheaper HMO:

    10. Your annual breast exam is done at Hooters.

    9. Directions to your doctor's office include "Take a left when you enter
    the trailer park."

    8. The tongue depressors taste faintly of Fudgesicles.

    7. The only proctologist in the plan is "Gus" from Roto-Rooter.

    6. The only item listed under Preventative Care coverage is "An apple a
    day."

    5. Your primary care physician is wearing the pants you gave to Goodwill
    last month.

    4. "The patient is responsible for 200% of out-of-network-charges" is not
    a
    typo.

    3. The only expense covered 100% is embalming.

    2. With your last HMO, your Prozac didn't come in different colors with
    little M's on them.


    And the number 1 sign you've joined a cheap HMO:

    1. You ask for Viagra; you get a Popsicle stick and duct tape.
    That's good. We haven't been in top ten list mode for years.

  16. #1391
    dennaB Twes's Avatar
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    Default Re: Random, Scattered Disturbed Thoughts

    It's 4:30... do you know where your personalities are?


  17. #1392
    International Counter bellisimo's Avatar
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    Default Re: Random, Scattered Disturbed Thoughts

    i've realized that all the crazy girls in my life have one thing in common...they're all born under the cancer sign...maybe there is some truth to this zodiac BS...

    tonight was a crazy night...this girl who i was kinda seein' for a while ends up hookin' with my best friend a couple of weeks ago...i was like whatever its their choice...didn't have too much feelings for 'em...

    so tonight while i'm out with some other girls she runs into me and starts begging me to kiss her and answer to her question as to why i don't love her...needless to say she just made a fool out of herself and finally got the message to leave...

    enter girl #2...hanged out with her the whole night...totally into it...but just broke up with her ex...so she was an emotional wreck...urgh...why do i always find the psycho ones?

    so now its 4:45am...and i ended the night by not hookin' up with anyone tonight...in the long run i think it was the right choice...

    ah well...a new day tomorrow...means new "opportunities"

  18. #1393
    dennaB Twes's Avatar
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    Default Re: Random, Scattered Disturbed Thoughts

    Quote Originally Posted by bellisimo View Post
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    i've realized that all the crazy girls in my life have one thing in common...they're all born under the cancer sign...maybe there is some truth to this zodiac BS...

    tonight was a crazy night...this girl who i was kinda seein' for a while ends up hookin' with my best friend a couple of weeks ago...i was like whatever its their choice...didn't have too much feelings for 'em...

    so tonight while i'm out with some other girls she runs into me and starts begging me to kiss her and answer to her question as to why i don't love her...needless to say she just made a fool out of herself and finally got the message to leave...

    enter girl #2...hanged out with her the whole night...totally into it...but just broke up with her ex...so she was an emotional wreck...urgh...why do i always find the psycho ones?

    so now its 4:45am...and i ended the night by not hookin' up with anyone tonight...in the long run i think it was the right choice...

    ah well...a new day tomorrow...means new "opportunities"
    Please tell us you have the day off today.

    I'd feel a lot better about this story if we had pictures of both women.

    We could be more, supportive.

    By the way. The German girl (on the right) is still my favorite.


  19. #1394
    International Counter bellisimo's Avatar
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    Default Re: Random, Scattered Disturbed Thoughts

    i wish...had to be up at 8am for work...its now 4:40pm...top it off i'm invited to a bachelor's party tonight...*sigh*

    girl #1




    girl #2

  20. #1395
    Fear my small avatar Gyron's Avatar
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    Default Re: Random, Scattered Disturbed Thoughts

    Move on from both, you'll be better for it....

  21. #1396
    International Counter bellisimo's Avatar
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    Default Re: Random, Scattered Disturbed Thoughts

    Quote Originally Posted by Gyron View Post
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    Move on from both, you'll be better for it....

    that is exactly my plan...already acquired new targets

  22. #1397
    dennaB Twes's Avatar
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    Default Re: Random, Scattered Disturbed Thoughts

    Quote Originally Posted by bellisimo View Post
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    i wish...had to be up at 8am for work...its now 4:40pm...top it off i'm invited to a bachelor's party tonight...*sigh*

    girl #1




    girl #2
    Brutal. 2 hours sleep. Worked all day today and now it's time for a long night.

    I think you're calling in sick tomorrow buddy.

    Thanks for the pictures.

    I wouldn't turn my back on girl #1. You might get the steak knife treatment.

    Have a great time tonight. Of course we'll need to hear all about it.

  23. #1398
    International Counter bellisimo's Avatar
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    Default Re: Random, Scattered Disturbed Thoughts

    Quote Originally Posted by Twes View Post
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    Brutal. 2 hours sleep. Worked all day today and now it's time for a long night.

    I think you're calling in sick tomorrow buddy.

    Thanks for the pictures.

    I wouldn't turn my back on girl #1. You might get the steak knife treatment.

    Have a great time tonight. Of course we'll need to hear all about it.
    its not the first time i've done this...going on a vacation/holiday break next friday for 2 weeks...so i'll have plenty of time to rest then

    as for tonight - cause I have the contacts to arrange a proper bachelor party/etc i have been given the duty of having it organized...i feel like just pissing people off a bit and pushing it off to tomorrow night instead of tonight.

  24. #1399
    Fear my small avatar Gyron's Avatar
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    Default Re: Random, Scattered Disturbed Thoughts

    Make sure you send picturs of the new targets so we can evaluate for you.

    You know you need our help

  25. #1400
    International Counter bellisimo's Avatar
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    Default Re: Random, Scattered Disturbed Thoughts

    Quote Originally Posted by Gyron View Post
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    Make sure you send picturs of the new targets so we can evaluate for you.

    You know you need our help
    i have no problem sharing photos of flings/hookups/etc
    when the target is a bit more serious then i'm not as "public"

    and at the moment the targets are a bit more on the serious side

    once they crash and burn like all the other psycho girls...then we can discuss more flings with visual aid

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