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Thread: For Christmas: Limited Edition Barbies

  1. #1
    Member Slick Pinkham's Avatar
    Join Date
    Jan 2004

    Default For Christmas: Limited Edition Barbies

    Limited Edition Barbies

    Mattel recently announced the release of 11 limited-edition Barbie dolls for the Greater Indianapolis market:

    Carmel Barbie
    This princess Barbie is sold only at Clay Terrace shopping center. She comes with an assortment of Kate Spade Handbags, a Lexus SUV, a long-haired foreign dog named Honey and a cookie-cutter house. Available with or without tummy tuck, breast augmentation and face lift. Workaholic Ken or Embezzlement Kenneth sold only in conjunction with an augmented version.

    Noblesville/Fishers Barbie
    The modern day homemaker Barbie is available with Ford Windstar Minivan and matching gym outfit. She gets lost easily and has no full-time occupation, secondary education or sex drive. Spends most of her time trying to one up the neighbors with expensive but useless purchases. Traffic jamming cell phone sold separately.

    East 10th Street Barbie
    This recently paroled Barbie comes with a 9mm handgun, a Ray Lewis knife, a Chevy with dark tinted windows, and a Meth Lab Kit. This model is only available after dark and must be paid for in cash (preferably small, untraceable bills) ...unless you are a cop, then we don't know what you are talking about.

    Geist Barbie
    This yuppie Barbie comes with your choice of BMW convertible or Hummer H2. Included is her own Starbucks cup, gold credit card and country club membership. Geist Barbie comes with regular or extra large breast augmentation. She also comes with most Pacers players. Also available for this set are Shallow Ken and Private School Skipper. You won't be able to afford any of them.

    Speedway Barbie
    This pale model comes dressed in her own Wrangler jeans two sizes too small, a NASCAR t-shirt and tweety bird tattoo on her shoulder. She has a six-pack of Bud light and a Hank Williams Jr. CD set. She can spit over 5 feet and kick mullet-haired Ken's butt when she is drunk. Purchase her pickup truck separately and get a confederate flag bumper sticker absolutely free.

    Downtown Barbie
    this collagen injected, rhinoplastic Barbie wears a leopard print
    outfit and drinks cosmopolitans while entertaining friends. Percocet prescription available as well as warehouse conversion condo.

    Beech Grove Barbie
    This tobacco-chewing, brassy-haired Barbie has a pair of her own high-heeled sandals with one broken heel from the time she chased beer-gutted Ken out of Speedway Barbie's house. Her ensemble includes low-rise acid-washed jeans, fake fingernails, and a see-through halter-top. Also available with a mobile home.

    Broadripple Barbie
    This doll is made of actual tofu. She has long straight brown hair,
    archless feet, hairy armpits, no makeup and Birkenstocks with white socks. She prefers that you call her Willow . She does not want or need a Ken doll, but if you purchase two Broadripple Barbies and the optional Subaru wagon, you get a rainbow flag bumper sticker for free.

    38th Street Barbie
    This Barbie now comes with a stroller and infant doll. Optional
    Accessories include a GED and bus pass. Gangsta Ken and his 1979 Caddy were available, but are now very difficult to find since the addition of the infant.

    Greenwood Barbie
    she has a year round tan, sunken cheeks and looks 10 years older than she really is. She has already been divorced twice and is bankrupt. Comes with a divorced and drunk mother who dresses 20 years younger than she is. We don't know where Ken is because he's always hunting.

    Irvington Barbie/Ken
    This versatile doll can be easily converted from Barbie to Ken by
    Simply adding or subtracting the multiple snap-on parts

  2. #2
    dennaB Twes's Avatar
    Join Date
    Jul 2006

    Default Re: For Christmas: Limited Edition Barbies

    "Gangsta Ken and his 1979 Caddy were available, but are now very difficult to find since the addition of the infant."

    "We don't know where Ken is because he's always hunting."

  3. #3
    DIET COKE! Trader Joe's Avatar
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    Jan 2006
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    Default Re: For Christmas: Limited Edition Barbies

    LMAO. Carmel one = so true.

  4. #4
    Member Travman93's Avatar
    Join Date
    Jun 2006

    Default Re: For Christmas: Limited Edition Barbies

    Speedway is oh so true

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