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Thread: The "What Have you Eaten Today?" Thread

  1. #126

    Default Re: The "What Have you Eaten Today?" Thread

    guess i will jump in now, seeing as im getting ready to hit the gym tonight for the 1st time in over 4 months due to a lower back problem.

    me = 34 years old (male), 5' 8' - 150 lbs...atheltic build with very little body fat (more of a runner / cycler than weightlifter..although i do both). Im also one of those hated types that eats a ton and puts on no weight!

    BREAKFAST- bag of grapes, 1 orange, onion bagle w/ low-fat creamcheese, 1 hardboiled egg.

    LUNCH- TBD

    DINNER - Shrimp Portifino with a spinach salad (left overs from last night).

  2. #127

    Default Re: The "What Have you Eaten Today?" Thread

    Breakfast: Smoothie, Turkey Bacon, 2 egg whites.

    Snack: Almonds and raisins.

    Lunch: Turkey and PB sandwhich on whole wheat bread, 1 egg white, celery.

    Snack: Almonds and raisins.

    Dinner: Hamburger meat, with sumpthin'.

    Snack: Neo-Citron smoothie.

  3. #128

    Default Re: The "What Have you Eaten Today?" Thread

    Breakfast: Smoothie (with a banana added this time), Go-Lean Krunch stuff.

    Snack: Almonds and raisins.

    Lunch: Turkey and PB sandwhich on whole wheat bread, celery.

    Snack: Almonds and raisins.

    Dinner: Unknown.

    Snack: Smoothie.

  4. #129

    Default Re: The "What Have you Eaten Today?" Thread

    Quote Originally Posted by btowncolt
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    Breakfast: Smoothie (with a banana added this time), Go-Lean Krunch stuff.

    Snack: Almonds and raisins.

    Lunch: Turkey and PB sandwhich on whole wheat bread, celery.

    Snack: Almonds and raisins.

    Dinner: Unknown.

    Snack: Smoothie.
    Ditto.

  5. #130
    Fear my small avatar Gyron's Avatar
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    Default Re: The "What Have you Eaten Today?" Thread

    Well, after my 3 day crash food poisoning diet, I dropped 7 lbs. total. Woohoo!

    Today I have been able to hold down(and IN without a rapid response) a small yougurt smoothie(breakfast), and 1/2 of a jr. cheeseburger plain and half a plain baked potato from Wendy's(lunch).

    You don't know what an accomplishment that is after the last three days....

  6. #131
    Go Colts! Shade's Avatar
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    Default Re: The "What Have you Eaten Today?" Thread

    Quote Originally Posted by btowncolt
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    Ditto.
    Heh, I pretty much stopped posting here because my routine is so similar from day to day. It gets tiring.

  7. #132

    Default Re: The "What Have you Eaten Today?" Thread

    Quote Originally Posted by Shade
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    Heh, I pretty much stopped posting here because my routine is so similar from day to day. It gets tiring.
    I made a steak burger for lunch tomorrow to mix it up.

    You can still count on those raisins and almonds........

  8. #133
    #PacerNation 317Kim's Avatar
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    Default Re: The "What Have you Eaten Today?" Thread

    5:36-Breakfast: Cinnamon Toast Crunch

    12:33-Lunch Turkey and Cheese sandwich.

  9. #134
    Fear my small avatar Gyron's Avatar
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    Default Re: The "What Have you Eaten Today?" Thread

    Breakfast: 1 fat free yougurt smoothie.
    Lunch will be : 2 - 2 oz Turkey Burgers, with a small amount of ketchup.
    Dinner will be: 5 oz grilled chicken with 2 oz of low fat cheese, and a little salsa.

    Somewhere in there Ill have a snack of some granola.

  10. #135

    Default Re: The "What Have you Eaten Today?" Thread

    Ryan's Steak House Story

    not for the faint of heart

    (not my story)

    Now, I know that there is a lot of embellishment that occurs on this group and I am aware that a small number of things are perhaps sheer fabrication, but I have a story to tell that is the absolute truth.

    Funniest damn thing that has ever happened to me. A couple of weeks ago we decided to cruise out to Ryan's Steakhouse for dinner. It was a Wednesday night which means that macaroni and beef was on the hot bar, indeed the only night of the week that it is served. Wednesday night is also kid's night at Ryan's, complete with Dizzy the Clown wandering from table to table entertaining the little *******s. It may seem that the events about to be told have little connection to those two circumstances, but all will be clear in a moment.

    We went through the line and placed our orders for the all-you-can-eat hot bar then sat down as far away from the front of the restaurant as possible in order to keep the density of kids down a bit. Then I started my move to the hot bar. Plate after plate of macaroni and beef were consumed that evening, I tell you - in all, four heaping plates of the pseudo-Italian ambrosia were shoved into my belly. I was sated. Perhaps a bit too much, however.

    I had not really been feeling well all day, what with a bit of gas and such. By the time I had eaten four overwhelmed plates of food, I was in real trouble. There was so much pressure on my diaphragm that I was having trouble breathing. At the same time, the downward pressure was building. At first I thought it was only gas, which could have been passed in batches right at the table without too much concern.

    Unfortunately, that was not to be. After a minute or so it was clear that I was dealing with explosive diarrhea. It's amazing how grease can make its way through your intestines far faster than the food which spawned the grease to begin with, but I digress... I got up from the table and made my way to the bathroom. Upon entering, I saw two sinks immediately inside the door, two urinals just to the right of the sinks, and two toilet stalls against the back wall. One of them was a handicapped bathroom. Now, normally I would have gone to the handicapped stall since I like to stretch out a bit when I take a good ****. But in this case, the door lock was broken and the only thing I hate worse than my wife telling me to stop cutting my toenails with a pair of diagonal wire-cutters is having someone walk in on me while I am taking a ****.

    I went to the normal stall. In retrospect, I probably should have gone to the large, handicapped stall even though the door would not lock because that bit of time lost in making the stall switch proved to be a bit too long under the circumstances. By the time I had walked into the regular stall, the pressure on my *** was reaching Biblical portions. I began "The Move."

    For those women who may be reading this, let me take a moment to explain "The Move." Men know exactly what their bowels are up to at any given second. And when the time comes to empty the cache, a sequence of physiological events occur that can not be stopped under any circumstances. There is a move men make that involves simultaneously approaching the toilet, beginning the body turn to position ones *** toward said toilet, hooking ones fingers into ones waistline, and pulling down the pants while beginning the squat at the same time. It is a very fluid motion that, when performed properly, results in the flawless expulsion of **** at the exact same second that one’s *** is properly placed on the toilet seat. Done properly, it even assures that the choad is properly inserted into the front rim of the toilet in the event that the **** stream lets loose at the same time; it is truly a picture of coordination rivaling that of a skilled ballet dancer.

    I was about halfway into "The Move" when I looked down at the floor and saw a pile of vomit that had been previously expelled by one of those little *******s attending kids night. It was mounded up in the corner so I did not notice it when I had first walked into the stall. Normally, I would not have been bothered by such a thing, but I had eaten so much and the pressure upward was so intense, that I hit a rarely experienced gag reflex. And once that reflex started, combined with the intense pressure upward caused by the bloated stomach, four plates of macaroni and beef started coming up for a rematch.

    What happened next was so quick that the exact sequence of events is a bit fuzzy, but I will try to reconstruct them as best I can. In that moment of impending projectile vomiting, my attention was diverted from the goings-on at the other end. To put a freeze frame on the situation, I was half crouched down to the toilet, pants pulled down to my knees, with a load of vomit coming up my esophagus.

    Now, most of you know that vomiting takes precedence over **** no matter what is about to come slamming out of your ***. It is apparently an evolutionary thing since ****ting will not kill you, but vomiting takes a presence of mind to accomplish so that you do not aspirate any food into the bronchial tubes and perhaps choke to death. My attention was thus diverted. At that very split second, my *** exploded in what can only be described as a wake...you know, as in a newspaper headline along the lines of "30,000 Killed In Wake of Typhoon Fifi" or something similar. In what seemed to be most suitably measured in cubic feet, an enormous plug of **** the consistency of thick mud with embedded pockets of greasy liquid came flying out of my ***.

    But remember, I was only halfway down on the toilet at that moment. The **** wave was of such force, and of just such an angle in relation to the back curve of the toilet seat, that it ricocheted off the back of the seat and slammed into the wall - at an angle of incidence equal to the angle at which it initially hit the toilet seat. Then I sat down. Recall that when that event occurred, I was already halfway to sitting anyway and had actually reached the point of no return. I have always considered myself as relatively stable gravitationally, but when you get beyond a certain point, you're going down no matter how limber you may be. Needless to say, the **** wave, though of considerable force, was not so sufficient so as to completely glance off the toilet seat and deposit itself on the walls - unlike what you would see when hitting a puddle with a high-pressure water hose; even though you throw water at the puddle, the puddle gets moved and no water is left to re-form a puddle. There was a significant amount of **** remaining on about one-third of the seat rim which I had now just collapsed upon.

    Now, back to the vomit...

    While all the ****ting was going on, the vomit was still on its way up. By the time I had actually collapsed on the toilet, my mouth had filled up with a goodly portion of the macaroni and beef I had just consumed. OK, so what does the human body instinctively do when vomiting? One bends over. So I bent over. I was still sitting on the toilet, though. Therefore, bending over resulted in me placing my head above my now slightly-opened legs, positioned in between my knees and waist. Also directly above my pants which were now pulled down to a point just midway between my knees and my ankles. Oh, did I mention that I was wearing not just pants, but sweatpants with elastic on the ankles. In one mighty push, some three pounds of macaroni and beef, two or three Cokes, and a couple of Big, Fat Yeast Rolls were deposited in my pants...on the inside...with no ready exit at the bottom down by my feet. In the next several seconds, there were a handful of farts, a couple of turds, and the event ended. Yet I was now sitting there with my pants full of vomit, my back covered in **** that had bounced off the toilet, spattered on three ceramic-tiled walls to a height of about five feet, and still had enough force to come back at me, covering the back of my shirt with droplets of liquid ****. All while thick **** was spread all over my *** in a ring curiously in the shape of a toilet seat.

    And there was no ****ing toilet paper. What could I do but laugh. I must have sounded like a complete maniac to the guy who then wandered into the bathroom. He actually asked if I was OK since I was laughing so hard I must have sounded like I was crying hysterically. I calmed down just enough to ask him if he would get the manager. And told him to have the manager bring some toilet paper. When the manager walked in, he brought the toilet paper with him, but in no way was prepared for what happened next. I simply told him that there was no way I was going to explain what was happening in the stall, but that I needed several wet towels and I needed him to go ask my wife to come help me. I told him where we were sitting and he left. At that point, I think he was probably assuming that I had pissed just a bit in my pants or something similarly benign.

    About two minutes later, my wife came into the bathroom not knowing what was wrong and with a certain amount of worry in her voice. I explained to her (still laughing and having trouble getting out words) that I had a slight accident and needed her help. Knowing that I had experienced some close calls in the past, she probably assumed that I had laid down a small turd or something and just needed to bring the car around so we could bolt immediately. Until I asked her, I'm sure she had no idea that she was about to go across the street and purchase me new underwear, new socks, new pants, a new shirt, and (by that time due to considerable leakage around the elastic ankles thingies) new sneakers. And she then started to laugh herself since I was still laughing. She began to ask for an explanation as to what had happened when I promised her that I would tell her later, but that I just needed to handle damage control for the time being. She left.

    The manager then came back in with a half-dozen wet towels and a few dry ones. I asked him to also bring a mop and bucket upon which he assured me that they would clean up anything that needed to be cleaned. Without giving him specific details, I explained that what was going on in that stall that night was far in excess of what I would expect anyone to deal with, what with most of the folks working at Ryan's making minimum wage of just slightly above. At that moment, I think it dawned on him exactly the gravity of the situation. Then that manager went so far above the call of duty that I will be eternally grateful for his actions. He hooked up a hose. Fortunately, commercial bathrooms are constructed with tile walls and tile floors and have a drain in the middle of the room in order to make clean up easy. Fortunately, I was in a commercial bathroom. He hooked up the hose to the spigot located under the sink as I began cleaning myself up with the wet towels.

    Just as I was finishing, my wife got back with the new clothes and passed them into the stall, whereupon I stuffed the previously worn clothing into the plastic bag that came from the store, handing the bag to my wife. I finished cleaning myself off and carefully put on my new clothes, still stuck in the stall since I figured that it would be in bad taste to go out of the stall to get redressed, in the event I happened to be standing there naked and some little ******* kid walked in. At that point, I had only made a mess; I had not yet committed a felony and intended to keep it that way.

    When I finished getting dressed, I picked up the hose and cleaned up the entire stall, washing down the remains toward the drain in the center of the room. I put down the hose and walked out of the bathroom. I had intended to go to the manager and thank him for all he had done, but when I walked out, three of the management staff were there to greet me with a standing ovation. I started laughing so hard that I thought I was going to throw up again, but managed to scurry out to the car where my wife was now waiting to pick me up by the front door.

    The upshot of all this is that I strongly recommend eating dinner at Ryan's Steak House. They have, by far, the nicest management staff of any restaurant in which I have eaten.

  11. #136

    Default Re: The "What Have you Eaten Today?" Thread

    Wow.

  12. #137

    Default Re: The "What Have you Eaten Today?" Thread

    sorry to spoil anyones' lunch.

    I read this story online awhile back and couldn't stop laughing.

  13. #138

    Default Re: The "What Have you Eaten Today?" Thread

    I killed this thread.

    Sorry guys.

    I'm hungry for some macaroni beef...

  14. #139

    Default Re: The "What Have you Eaten Today?" Thread

    Meh, Shade and I were really keeping it up, but he's right: You can only post eating the same thing so many times before you just stop posting it anymore.

  15. #140

    Default Re: The "What Have you Eaten Today?" Thread

    I ran my first timed mile in a couple years this weekend.

    I ran about 3 miles to "warm up", then hopped on the treadmill. Got one out in 6:30. Not where I want to be out ideally, but a hell of a lot better than I thought I could since I really only got back to running around Xmas. I hope to have that down in the 5 range by summer (though it's unlikely I'll ever get it back into the 5:10 range I had back in the day when I used to be in real shape for various sports).

  16. #141
    Thanks Kesty! Pig Nash's Avatar
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    Default Re: The "What Have you Eaten Today?" Thread

    awesome, btown, i could probably pop one out that fast, but I'd be done after that.

    I had a french bread pizza for dinner tonight. All I eat is pizza, it feels like.

  17. #142
    flexible and robust SoupIsGood's Avatar
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    Default Re: The "What Have you Eaten Today?" Thread

    turkey + bread
    water
    milk
    water
    protein shake
    water
    a little bit of spahgetti sauce, mmmmm
    water
    You, Never? Did the Kenosha Kid?

  18. #143

    Default Re: The "What Have you Eaten Today?" Thread

    Quote Originally Posted by SoupIsGood
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    turkey + bread
    water
    milk
    water
    protein shake
    water
    a little bit of spahgetti sauce, mmmmm
    water
    Eat more.

  19. #144
    flexible and robust SoupIsGood's Avatar
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    Default Re: The "What Have you Eaten Today?" Thread

    Quote Originally Posted by btowncolt
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    Eat more.
    The turkey sandwich and shake were actually quite large
    You, Never? Did the Kenosha Kid?

  20. #145

    Default Re: The "What Have you Eaten Today?" Thread

    Quote Originally Posted by SoupIsGood
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    The turkey sandwich and shake were actually quite large
    Fine!

    Eat more frequently.

  21. #146

    Default Re: The "What Have you Eaten Today?" Thread

    Breakfast- ice Water, 5 crackers, 2 peanut butter girl scout cookies.

    Lunch- Ham, lettuce and cheese sub and pinapple

    Supper-Hamburger and couple glasses of ice water
    Life without water is tough, life without air is hard,life with one leg only is wobbly, Life without Reggie Miller, is impossible.

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  22. #147
    Team Raskolnikov's Avatar
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    Default Re: The "What Have you Eaten Today?" Thread

    Today I had a "vegetarian broccoli triangle".

    Thought that was worth mentioning.

  23. #148
    Fear my small avatar Gyron's Avatar
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    Default Re: The "What Have you Eaten Today?" Thread

    Small glass of orange Juice and a banana for breakfast.

    A double cheeseburger, french fries and a medium sweet tea from Hardees for lunch.

    Want to talk about un healthy........ack!

    And Im going out to dinner tonight....Quaker Steak and Lube....Can't wait for the hot wings.....maybe tomorrow I'll go back to semi healthy?

  24. #149

    Default Re: The "What Have you Eaten Today?" Thread

    I just wanted to ask a Couple questions:

    A) Am I the only person that thinks whole wheat bread is nasty?
    B) Is it really better for you than other kinds of bread?
    C) What exactly is the process cottage cheese goes through to make it like it is?
    D) Why is cottage cheese so nasty?
    Life without water is tough, life without air is hard,life with one leg only is wobbly, Life without Reggie Miller, is impossible.

    Do Not Trade Austin

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    Veteran Austin Croshere, the longest-tenured Pacers player on the roster, has proven reliable when called upon, invariably ready to step in regardless of the circumstance.

  25. #150
    - .-- ... ... Natston's Avatar
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    Default Re: The "What Have you Eaten Today?" Thread

    Snack: Dry white toast
    Dinner: Four fried chickens and a Coke
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