I am student teaching (a internship) for a 3rd grade class. For half of the class English is a second language and 2 students don't speak English beyond "good morning" and "restroom". But that is not what drives me crazy. It's my Master teacher.

* Suggestions on teaching mean and median:
"Make each student say the definition 10 times."

* To a non-english speaking student in the country for 6 weeks:
"What did Aksel say? (waits) You are not listening. You have to listen."

* After spending 20 minutes deciding what to assign for homework:
"I need to see what your assigning for math homework. Knowing what you are going to do helps move things along." (The assignments I was responisble for were passed out; she was the one who did not know what to assign.)

* After telling me to skip 5 lessons in the math book the week before:
"Wow, you are going pretty quick through the material." (I taught one lesson each day in the order it was presented in the book.)

* After assigning for homework to write a persuasive paragraph on why Harut, who had just returned from the principal's office, should keep his hands to himself:
"I hope his parents aren't too rough on him."

* After stopping a lesson that I am teaching so that she can read the manual:
"I guess you are right they are supposed to work in pairs."

These pearls of wisdom you all recieve free. I, however, get to pay tuition plus work 40 hours a week free of charge in order to recieve.